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Psycho: are you a hypersensitive parent?

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Psycho: are you a hypersensitive parent?

You are convinced that your child feels everything more strongly than others and is particularly emotional. But what if you were the real hypersensitive person in the family? Explanations and advice from the psychologist and specialist in this issue affect 20% of the population.

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Are you often worried and on edge? Do you feel like you’re the only person who understands your children? What if you were the hypersensitive one in the family? Don’t worry; you are not an exception: hypersensitivity affects 20% of the population.

Discover the top 10 characteristics of the hypersensitive parent. And the advice of a psychologist and specialist in this field to help you turn it into strength when raising your children.

1. You are often anxious

Worry, anxiety and fear are emotions that you know well. Indeed, your acute sense of danger (for yourself and others) and perfectionism also push you to track down the slightest risks in your environment. Thus you frantically monitor the temperature of your baby’s room (to minimize the risk of cot death), you check that the nursery door closes properly when you leave, you dread being abducted in the supermarket as soon as you turn your back on your baby to grab a jar of mustard, etc.

The advantage

Your caution actually protects your child.

The right compromise

Listen to yourself, but force yourself to let go when you feel someone is looking at you strangely!

2. You feel exhausted

This is partly because of your anxiety. But not only! In fact, positive emotions also make you feel tired. And they are diverse when you become a parent: the joy of the birth, the happiness of the whole family, the excitement of the newness, the pleasures of childhood that remind you of your own (a walk in nature, the discovery of a toy, a new taste). Not to mention the great moments, friendly gatherings, birthdays, trips to the zoo that make others smile and that provoke a form of euphoria in you. Exhausting too!

The advantage

You live your parenthood to the fullest.

The right compromise

Make sure you limit the sources of stimulation, one invitation or outing per weekend, not two!

3. You feel like you are the only one who understands your child

One of the significant characteristics of hypersensitivity is empathy. Your sensory finesse allows you to understand your child/children without them even expressing themselves (especially in the case of a toddler who doesn’t speak or a teenager who doesn’t want to talk!) Their facial expressions, their gestures, the color of their skin: a thousand signs alert you to the emotions that run through them. And that they are also going through you “in the mirror”.

The advantage

You are hyper intuitive and know precisely how to help them get out of an uncomfortable situation.

The right compromise

Remain modest about this “sixth sense” because you are sometimes mistaken in projecting your feelings onto those of your children. Your spouse, especially if he or she is not hypersensitive, can help you to distance yourself. The same goes for a doctor, a teacher, a grandparent. Their advice, even if it seems disconnected to you, is undoubtedly good.

4. You suffer from a lot of pain

Short nights or waking up every few hours, shopping bags to carry, babies to rock, meals eaten on the run: the daily life of a young parent sometimes resembles an Olympic event. For hypersensitive parents who are subjected to an avalanche of positive and negative emotions in addition to these “physical constraints”, burn-out is just around the corner! You then feel a host of symptoms that sound the alarm about your stress level: back pain, digestive problems, difficulty falling asleep, migraines and sometimes repeated infections as your immune system weakens.

The advantage

Your body is at the end of its rope, and you have to stop!

The good compromise

Take time out to recharge your batteries and “refocus”: a yoga session, a hot bath, a walk-in nature (alone)!

5. You have difficulty making decisions

This is a consequence of worry. Your desire to “do the right thing” pushes you to inquire for a long time before making choices for your children. And that goes from the type of bottle (glass or plastic?) to the choice of school (private or public?) to the choice of your professional life (parental leave, retraining, taking up work 100%?).

The advantage

You don’t take anything lightly!

The good compromise

Set limits! Once you’ve made a decision, there’s no turning back, and no one will ask you to justify it.

6. Education of children: you go from “all permissive” to “too authoritarian.”

As you understand your child/children well, you easily put up with their tantrums or tantrums that seem logical to you, resulting from an emotion that you have grasped or even of tiredness that you measure. As a result, you tend to remain very patient despite the cries and the shouts, sometimes too much for your spouse’s taste.

On the other hand, if you are in an emotional overload situation (perhaps reliving buried emotions or suffering from different invasive feelings outside the family), you won’t have an ounce of patience left to offer your children and risk sending them to their room or depriving them of dessert for a trifle.

The advantage

You handle both educational styles brilliantly!

The compromise

If you feel that you’re overdoing it (permissive or authoritarian), hand over to another adult while you find the right tempo.

7. You feel guilty

Since you can clearly imagine how your actions could cause inconvenience or sadness to others, guilt does not often leave you. This is the case when you do not dare to say no to a friend who wants to come and see your baby or when you agree to manage the nursery’s end-of-year party in spite of your busy schedule. It is also the case if you hesitate to hire a cleaning lady for whom you fear a hard job. In short, your sense of guilt reduces your ability to get help or rest.

The advantage

You do not risk hurting the people around you.

The good compromise

Tell yourself that the people around you are responsible for their reactions to your positions. Not the other way around.

8. You test everything all the time

Your propensity to think about the best survival strategies and the quest for happiness for everything and all the time makes you a fan of new experiences. Cododo, Montessori, baby-dancing: anything that comes up as an innovative educational idea attracts you and draws you into a whirlwind of creativity.

The advantage

You are a leader for all your parent’s friends!

The right compromise

Test concepts over a short period of time and measure the consequences of this new activity on your daily life. The main thing is not to exhaust yourself, even if it gives you intense sensations.

9. You run away from noise

Nursery rhymes on a loop, cartoons in the background, summer hits that shake the walls of the house, chairs squeaking, a balloon banging on the garden wall, the anger of the youngest child, the joyful cries of the second child: a family’s sound universe can push a hypersensitive parent off his or her feet.

The advantage

Your neighbors will thank you for putting a stop to the noise.

The trade-off

Establish rules to keep your time together peaceful, especially in the evening or in small spaces (car, kitchen). And when nothing works, imagine that you are in a bubble and that nothing can get to you. Variation: use earplugs!

10. Clutter bothers you

Another side effect of your perfectionism and hypersensitive sensors: a house in disarray, toys are strewn across the living room carpet, puts you in a tizzy.

The advantage

You’ll become a pro at tidying up, and so will your children.

The compromise

Accept the mess, but inside large baskets or toy racks. That way, nothing is “lying around” in your mind, and it’s not difficult to get the little ones to contribute.


Parenting is both the most valuable and one of the most challenging tasks. This is especially true for susceptible persons. Compassionate parents are particularly tuned in to their children. They consider every topic that affects their children carefully and experience intense emotions, both positive and bad.

They are acutely aware of their surroundings and are frequently over stimulated by them.

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